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by Abigail Van Buren

Widow's Plans to Move On With Life Don't Sit Well With Daughter

DEAR ABBY: My fiancee, "Mia," lost her dad two years ago, and her mother recently announced to the family that she is seeing someone. She has been staying over at his house, and she is planning to sell her home and move in with him. Mia is very upset about it.

Her mom is now in the process of getting rid of her father's belongings. She feels like her mom is erasing her father from their lives. How long should her mother have waited? Is Mia being selfish? Shouldn't she be happy for her mother? -- GOING FORWARD IN THE EAST

DEAR GOING: I hesitate to call your fiancee selfish as much as self-centered. Her mother has waited a respectful amount of time. She isn't erasing her late husband from her life or her children's as much as going on with hers, which is healthy.

I wish you had mentioned how long she has been seeing the man she's planning on moving in with, because it might be pertinent. For her own protection, she should discuss her plans with her lawyer to ensure that she -- and her assets -- are safeguarded before she sells her house.

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