DEAR ABBY: My 29-year-old daughter just moved out on her own from the bedroom she has occupied since she was 7 months old and into a nice place. She has been dating "Ben" for five years. She has helped Ben and stuck by him. Despite the fact that Ben doesn't have a degree, my daughter has helped him improve his potential, and he now has licenses and gets well-paying jobs.
When he met my daughter, he lived with his mom. My daughter gave him the push to get his own place and helped him decorate. Ben is eight years older than she is and has a 9-year-old daughter from a previous relationship, whom my daughter gets along with.
I guess because parents have expectations for their kids, I thought by now there would have been some sort of talk about their future. She and Ben are still together, but I don't know if this relationship is headed anywhere. I like him, and I have a great relationship with my daughter. I don't want to intrude on her private life. What can I do to get them to move toward the future? -- CARING DAD IN NEW JERSEY
DEAR DAD: You are certainly free to have the discussion with your daughter, but as much as you love her, this is not your journey. It's hers and Ben's. Don't be a back-seat driver. They are enjoying the present, and the future will take care of itself.