DEAR ABBY: I have a friend and co-worker who likes to play with my hair, rub my back and put her hands on me in general. I am not a touchy-feely kind of person with anyone, and it makes me very uncomfortable when she does this. Is there a polite way of telling her to stop without making her feel uncomfortable or hurting her feelings? I'm not a "beat around the bush" kind of person, and I sometimes lack the tact of putting things nicely. -- NO TOUCHY-FEELY
DEAR NO TOUCHY-FEELY: To express your feelings would not be lacking in tact; it would be setting a boundary. Try this: "I like you very much, and I know the feelings are mutual, but I do not like to be touched, and I want you to stop doing it."