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Wife Reaches End of Her Rope in Life With Domineering Man

DEAR ABBY: I am writing this with overwhelming sadness. My 75-year-old husband is a tyrant. Our neighbors hate him, and so do our children. He is an overbearing, impetuous child.

I cry every day. I can't talk to him without him yelling. I am a subservient person. How do I go on with this? He is very healthy. I try so hard, and I have no life. He says mean things to me all the time. Please give me some advice. -- FLOUNDERING IN FLORIDA

DEAR FLOUNDERING: Please start asking yourself why you think you deserve the verbal abuse you receive from your husband and why you tolerate his bullying. Were you raised this way? What message has it sent to your children? Then remind yourself that we have only one life to live. Is this how you intend to spend it until the day you die or he does?

Gather all the information you can regarding your husband's (and your) finances. Once you have that information, contact a lawyer who specializes in family law. I can't change your husband and neither can you. But you can change the way you react to his verbal abuse by refusing to tolerate it any longer.

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