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by Abigail Van Buren

Not Every Family Member Is Welcome at Daughter's Wedding

DEAR ABBY: My daughter is marrying someone of a different faith. She doesn't want to invite my husband's first cousin and her spouse to her wedding. The spouse is openly racist, anti-Semitic and homophobic, and the cousin doesn't contradict him.

My daughter is inviting people of different faiths, ethnicities and sexual orientations. She does not want to share her wedding day with someone who is filled with hate for her other guests and for her fiance. Although we don't socialize with this cousin and her spouse, my husband believes "family is family" and they should be invited. What is your opinion? -- ON MY DAUGHTER'S SIDE

DEAR O.M.D.S.: I disagree with your husband. Because someone is a relative does not require the individual to be invited to every family function, particularly when your branch of the family doesn't socialize with them otherwise. However, if your husband still insists they receive an invitation, he should follow up the invitation with a phone call detailing what will be expected of guests regarding civility and decorum.

Read more in: Family & Parenting | Holidays & Celebrations