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by Abigail Van Buren

Hospital Worker Is Stunned by Stepfather's Appearance

DEAR ABBY: My son got married a little over a year ago. They have a new baby. They are heavily in debt. He works full time plus a job on Saturday. She could work as a substitute teacher but prefers to stay at home with the baby.

I'm concerned about my son working so much. She brought indebtedness into this marriage. She agreed to work and now she doesn't. It doesn't seem fair to our boy. He's very kind and has a sensitive heart. Should I say something? -- CONCERNED MOM

DEAR CONCERNED: It may not seem fair, but do not insert yourself into this situation. Your "boy" is now an adult, and it's important that you let him speak up for himself. If you interfere -- even though you are trying to help -- you will come across as overbearing, which may cost you a relationship with your daughter-in-law and your grandchild.