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by Abigail Van Buren

Anger Fuels Family Turmoil After News of Affair

DEAR ABBY: One of our in-laws recently confessed about a long-term affair. The details are widely known. The closest family members, and especially the couple's adult children, are shocked, devastated and angry. No one wants to even talk to the cheater.

The aggrieved spouse wants to keep the marriage together. It is hard to imagine that time will heal these wounds. How can my wife and I support the aggrieved spouse and the devastated children? Should we try to re-establish ties with the cheater? If so, do we just talk about the weather, or do we acknowledge the elephant in the room? -- TRYING TO DO WHAT'S RIGHT

DEAR TRYING: If you truly want to support the spouse and adult children, let them know you are there for them if they want to talk. If you socialize with the husband and wife as a couple, continue to behave as you always have with them and discuss the topics you always did. Couples can get past turbulence in their marriage more easily without unsolicited interference.

Read more in: Family & Parenting | Marriage & Divorce