Join the debate. Vote Now on the Dear Abby Poll of the week.

by Abigail Van Buren

Grandson Skips Out of Memorial to Be First in Line at Reception

DEAR ABBY: My daughter invited me to a celebration of life for a schoolmate of hers. Everyone gathered outside at a park pavilion to listen to a minister and friends or family speak about the deceased.

Twenty minutes before the last speaker was done I noticed my 22-year-old grandson had gone inside the building where there was food for everyone. When I asked my daughter where he had gone, she said he had gone to the bathroom. Abby, there were no restrooms in the building.

When the speakers were finished, the minister invited everyone to go inside for food and refreshments. When my daughter and I went inside, there sat my grandson eating away. He was the only person doing so. I asked my daughter why he was eating before everyone had even been invited, and her answer was, "He's a growing boy."

I thought what he did was rude and uncalled for. Am I too old school, or am I out of touch with the new "way"? -- GRANDDAD IN KANSAS

DEAR GRANDDAD: You are not out of touch. Your grandson's behavior was selfish and insensitive. Someone should have mentioned that fact to him. He's not a growing boy. He's an adult with boorish manners.

Read more in: Death | Etiquette & Ethics