DEAR ABBY: I started dating my next-door neighbor two years ago. We have known each other for 17 years. We hit it off, and after about a month he was spending every night with me. He's 72 and retired; I'm 55 and work full time. We have a great relationship, but I feel he is stalling about marrying me.
In the beginning, he said if we were together after one year we would talk about selling one or both of our houses and having just one. It hasn't happened. I make his breakfast each morning. Then I go to work and he goes to his house. He comes back at lunch to let my dogs out. When I get home at 5, he comes over and I cook supper. (He does buy some groceries and will start dinner every once in a while.) He then stays until I leave for work the next day. And he's here every weekend, too. He does go home to shower.
I think after two years he should know whether he wants to marry me or not. His last divorce was 20 years ago, and mine was seven years ago. I love him, and he says he isn't putting me off, he just wishes I could be "patient." I think it's stupid to have two houses when he stays with me every night. I pay my own bills, and he pays his. Do you think I'm wasting my time with him? -- READY FOR CHANGE IN SOUTH CAROLINA
DEAR READY: Whether you are wasting your time remains to be seen. After two years I don't think you are being "impatient" to want a commitment from him. That's why you both need to have a serious, lay-it-on-the-line discussion about what your goals are. If marriage isn't one of his, he should let you know NOW.