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For Man in Grad School, Timing May Not Be Right for Having Kids

DEAR ABBY: I am a gay male in my late 20s, finishing up my grad school program. My boyfriend is older than I am by seven years. We met in 2017, but I suffered a loss in my family and was grieving for about six months. We met again over the summer and continued our relationship from June to the present.

He just texted me about the future, saying he wants children in a year or two. I am anxious and sad because this feels like a make-or-break decision. I do want children and think I will be a good father. However, a child is a huge responsibility, and I am well aware of that. I don't know how soon I'll be ready. I don't even know what the next year will bring. What say you, Dear Abby? -- LACKS CERTAINTY IN MINNESOTA

DEAR LACKS CERTAINTY: I say you need to return your boyfriend's text and tell him exactly what you have written to me. Your feelings are honest, and your thinking is clear. Now that you know where he stands, it is important he knows where you do.

That said, I'm surprised this subject was brought up in a text and not during a one-on-one conversation because of its importance.

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