Join the debate. Vote Now on the Dear Abby Poll of the week.

by Abigail Van Buren

Lead Singer's Showmanship Is Panned by Bandmates

DEAR ABBY: I recently started a band with some close friends. At the beginning, everything was going great because we all have similar tastes in music. However, recently the lead singer has gotten more and more attention-seeking.

It started out small where he would make jokes on stage and try and get a laugh out of people. But now he's getting really outlandish, wearing crazy outfits and overall just acting ridiculous. How can I help him get back to just caring about the music and leaving the antics behind? -- EAST COAST MUSICIAN

DEAR MUSICIAN: You have my sympathy. Tom Hanks wrote and directed a movie about this subject in 1996. It is called "That Thing You Do!" If you can locate it, I am sure you will find it interesting.

As destructive as the hardships of being constantly on the road have been for performers in the music and entertainment business, EGO can be equally so. Your bandmate may be trying his best to upstage the rest of you or may think a gimmick could excite your audience. Try talking to him about it, but accept that you may have to replace him. If that's the case, be sure the person you hire has the same vision for the band that you do, so this won't happen again.

Read more in: Family & Parenting | Friends & Neighbors