DEAR ABBY: I am asking for advice about our daughters-in-law. We have two sons whose wives want to spend every holiday with their parents, period. No alternating holidays. This means my husband and I spend the holidays alone, then "get" to have a get-together at a date and time convenient for them.
I know our sons are partly at fault, but they are trying to keep peace in their lives. Any suggestions would be appreciated. One daughter-in-law used the excuse that her grandfather is 99 and may not be around forever, to which I replied that I'm 70 and none of us know how long we have.
We raised our daughter to respect her in-laws as well as us, and she alternates holidays. Please help with this, Abby. -- MISSING OUT IN TEXAS
DEAR MISSING OUT: This happens in many families. I wish I could wave a magic wand and turn your daughters-in-law into less-insensitive, more-caring people, but I can't. Your sons are more than "partly" at fault for not insisting on fairness. Because they're not assertive, the most pragmatic suggestion I can offer is that you make plans of your own for the holidays that don't include them -- the nicest your budget allows.