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by Abigail Van Buren

Long Lost Father Is Found, but Then Quickly Lost Again

DEAR ABBY: My roommate loves watching documentaries about serial killers, psychopaths and other criminals. I don't like them. To me it feels like a glorification of a person who did evil.

On the flip side, I watch tons of spy movies, superhero movies and action films that depict violence. But the distinction lies in that what I watch is fiction. Usually the good guys win, and if they don't, it's temporary.

My roommate gets really mad when I watch or even talk about the movies I watch, but becomes really defensive when I compare them to what she watches. My roommate is very fragile emotionally and cries, withdraws and shuts down when I do this. The last time, she insinuated I was less of a person for liking these things. Ultimately, I felt sorry for bringing it up, and she still refuses to acknowledge that we are allowed to like different things without being bad people.

I need to know how to bring up that how she responds to the things I like hurts me, and communicate that I have nothing against what she watches, even if it's not my taste. How can I communicate my feelings without feeling like I'm being insensitive for asking her to stop berating me? -- JUST A MOVIE IN THE MIDWEST

DEAR JUST A MOVIE: The most diplomatic solution would be for the two of you to agree that certain subjects of conversation should be avoided -- this being one of them. And if you can't agree to respect each other's viewing habits without being judgmental, you should find other roommates as soon as your lease is up.

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