DEAR ABBY: A longtime friend of mine, "Jenny," and I reunited after years of not speaking. Our pregnancies brought us back together, and since the births of our children we have had playdates, shared baby stories, advice, etc.
My problem is, Jenny tries to pass down stained, out-of-season clothes from her child to mine. (She gets free handouts from organizations that help moms and families who aren't financially well off.) She and her child's father drive brand-new cars with hefty car payments, and they are paying a big mortgage -- all the while collecting assistance.
It bothers me because, while we struggle, my family doesn't use assistance. We feel it should be used only for those who really need it. Am I silly for letting something like this get to me? I find myself making excuses to cancel playdates and avoid her. -- MAKING MY OWN WAY IN VIRGINIA
DEAR MAKING: Your problem isn't the baby clothes. It's that you disapprove of Jenny's values. While you have some things in common, you also have major differences. Among them, your choice to work for what you get and her willingness to game the system. That's a big difference, and you're not being silly.