DEAR ABBY: I have been with my boyfriend nearly 19 years, and we both agree that we don't want marriage. I just found out that for the last nine months he has been seeing someone else on his lunch break.
He says he loves me and doesn't want to lose me, but he loves her, too, and she is his friend. He said he would stop the affair, but because she's his friend, he won't stop texting and seeing her "as a friend."
Should I trust what he is saying? We don't have kids together, but we raised his two and my one together as our own. -- SILENT PAIN
DEAR PAIN: Should you trust that your boyfriend won't resume the affair with his "friend" -- or that he has stopped it? I don't think so. Although the two of you aren't formally married, you have had an understanding that lasted almost 19 years, and he has breached it. You now must decide whether you want to be part of a "threesome," and for that, you have my sympathy.