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by Abigail Van Buren

Disabled Wife Gets No Help Hosting In-Laws for the Holidays

DEAR ABBY: My in-laws are angry that I have declined to host them over the holidays this year. My husband is never helpful. When company comes, he sits on his mobile phone while I do everything. I told his parents I can't have them over because all the responsibility falls on me. My "no" should suffice, but my mother-in-law hopes to argue me into hosting.

We don't have children because I knew I would end up raising them alone. I don't want the in-laws here "hinting" that they need us to help them when my husband won't lift a finger.

I recently became disabled, and my in-laws keep pressuring me to share my diagnosis with them. They think I should cheerfully do all the work of hosting them as a way to fight my disability!

They are extremely nosy. I am now blocking her calls. I know they will spend their time here trying to get a look at my medications and any financial information left out. What else can I do? -- UNMERRY IN LOUISIANA

DEAR UNMERRY: You should all try to achieve a workable compromise, if that's possible. Ask your MIL if she's prepared to take some of the responsibility off your shoulders if she and her husband visit. Suggest they stay in a hotel or motel rather than burden you. And your husband (their son) should back you up on this.

Read more in: Family & Parenting | Marriage & Divorce | Holidays & Celebrations | Health & Safety