DEAR ABBY: My husband lacks sympathy. When people die, he has the attitude of, "Oh well, people die." I thought he would change once someone close to him died, but his father died a few months ago, and although he shed some tears, he refused to eulogize him at the funeral and is back to his old attitude. His mother is the same way.
Recently, my grown son phoned me in the middle of the night to let me know that his best friend's dad had died. He was very upset and needed to talk. My husband was annoyed that he woke us about someone we didn't even know, and went on to say how ridiculous it was that my son was so upset. I told him that, as a mom, I will talk my son through any problem, whether he agrees with it or not. He just grumbled and went back to sleep.
This is still bothering me. I wonder how my husband will act toward my children if I die first. I worry that he will say "suck it up and stop crying" when they need him the most. I don't think this is worth ending a 30-year marriage over, but it makes me angry that he is so unsympathetic. Any ideas on how I should handle this? -- FULL OF FEELING IN ARIZONA
DEAR FULL: Yes. Outlive him.