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by Abigail Van Buren

Man Has Second Thoughts About Taking Husband to High School Reunion

DEAR ABBY: I'm a happily married gay man living in metro Atlanta. My 50th high school reunion is approaching and I want to take my husband. The reunion is being held in a small rural town in the Midwest. Of course, I haven't lived there in 50 years, but I go there occasionally for family events.

I come from a large family, lots of brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews, and grandnieces and grandnephews, many of whom still live in my hometown. I don't know if all of them know about my situation and I'm not that concerned, but I am concerned about small-town gossip that can be mean-spirited. I wouldn't want anyone to be hurt.

I know my relatives interact professionally and personally with some of my classmates and their descendants. Am I being overly concerned, or should I just go and let the chips fall where they may? That's the thing about coming out as gay -- it's an ongoing process, even at my age. -- GAY GRADUATE IN GEORGIA

DEAR GAY GRADUATE: Go to the reunion, take your husband and have a good time. If anyone has a problem with the fact that you are homosexual and married, do not make it your problem. We can't control what someone might say behind our backs. But whatever is said is a reflection on the speaker -- not us or our relatives. Because people live in small towns does not mean they are all small-minded.

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