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by Abigail Van Buren

Rekindled Romance Should Be Put on Hold

DEAR ABBY: Ten years ago, when I lived in California, I dated the love of my life, "Tammy." We were perfect together, and I was often amazed by how much I loved her, which was palpable.

After about two years we broke up, and I moved 3,000 miles away. My rebound relationship lasted a decade and produced a beautiful baby boy. After it recently ended, I reached out to Tammy. We hadn't communicated in 10 years, and I learned that she is married with three kids and she's miserable.

She said she misses me and has never stopped loving me. We talk on the phone often, and she says she wants to see me. I have no idea where this is going, but I'd love to see her. We have decided that we will abide by your advice. What should I do? -- NOSTALGIC IN NEW YORK

DEAR NOSTALGIC: I'm glad you asked, although I doubt you will heed my advice. Here it is: You and Tammy should postpone any reunions until she has resolved her marital situation because there are more people involved now than just the two of you. Whether she remains in her unhappy marriage is anyone's guess, but if you step in now, it will only add to her troubles.

Read more in: Love & Dating