DEAR ABBY: I have been in a relationship with a wonderful man for more than a year. He has sole custody of his 10-year-old son, "Jordan." Because of our financial circumstances at the time, we moved in with each other right away. Jordan's mother is not in the picture and, unfortunately, I inherited her parenting responsibilities because of it.
Jordan is a sweet boy, but I have no emotional attachment to him. To be honest, I'm disappointed every time he walks in the door after school and I'm forced to stop what I am doing in order to care for him.
Abby, I thought I would become more attached to Jordan as time went on, but instead, I'm feeling resentful. I'm embarrassed to have made a commitment to this man and his son and to have ended up in this situation. I don't want to break up with the love of my life, but I don't want to sacrifice the next eight years of my life raising a child who isn't mine. Do you have any advice for me? -- CONFLICTED IN SACRAMENTO, CALIF.
DEAR CONFLICTED: Yes, as a matter of fact, I do. If Jordan's father is really "the love of your life," you had better accept that he and his son are a package deal and treat the child with love. If you can't manage that, then do them both a favor and bow out of the picture NOW.
P.S. And because none of this is Jordan's fault, while you're packing, assure him that your leaving has nothing to do with him, only with you. It's the truth, and that way, he won't blame himself for something that's not his fault.