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by Abigail Van Buren

Widower Refuses To Erase Tattoo Link To Late Wife

DEAR ABBY: I recently married "Ron," a widower. His wife "Marianne" died three years ago. They had a solid, happy marriage. Ron's father had a heart attack and died at their wedding reception.

Ron had a tattoo put on his arm -- "E.R.M." and the date. The letters stand for his father ("Erwin"), Ron and Marianne. The date is their wedding date. Ron says that on that day the three of them were eternally bound. I don't like the tattoo, but Ron adamantly refuses to have it removed.

I'm mostly unhappy about Ron's feeling that there's an eternal bond between him, his late wife and his father. Am I unreasonable for wanting him to remove it? -- INKED OUT WEST

DEAR INKED: Yes! It's a huge mistake to compete with dead people. It is understandable that your husband would feel love for his deceased wife and father. That love is part of why he's the person he is today -- the man you fell in love with. The sooner you learn to appreciate him for all the love in his heart, the healthier your marriage will be.

Read more in: Marriage & Divorce | Death