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by Abigail Van Buren

Mom Says 20-Somethings Still On Parents' Gravy Train Should Disembark

DEAR ABBY: At what point should grown kids in their 20s pay for their own "extras" (cellphone, gas, movies, gym memberships)? In my opinion, if they can't afford these luxuries, they should get a second job or do without. My husband, on the other hand, thinks they should be "rewarded" simply for being good kids.

At this stage in their lives, I think gifts should be reserved for birthdays and Christmas only and that we have been raising kids with a sense of entitlement that may be detrimental to their future (and to our retirement). What are your thoughts on this? -- ODD WOMAN OUT IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR ODD WOMAN OUT: My thoughts are these: If you are truly concerned that your husband's generosity could have a negative impact on your retirement savings, then he may be overly generous. If the "children" expect these gifts and don't realize how lucky they are to be receiving this kind of largesse, the gifts should be stopped. However, if neither of these things is true and your husband derives pleasure from doing this for them, you should stay out of it.

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