DEAR ABBY: I live with my longtime boyfriend in a house he owns. We're five hours away from my parents and siblings and the town in which I grew up. It's a beautiful house with lots of land, and I can imagine raising a family here. However, I always thought that if I had children, I'd live close to the rest of my family. I would want my parents nearby so they could lend a hand, and I want my kids to have a close relationship with their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.
My boyfriend is open to the idea of selling the house, but I'm not sure I would want him to. What should I do? I love this house, but how can I start a family so far from my own? -- LOOKING AHEAD IN NEW JERSEY
DEAR LOOKING AHEAD: Before you make any decisions, discuss this with your parents and see if their vision of grandparenthood is similar to your fantasy. Take into consideration how close they are to your siblings and how involved they are in each other's lives. Be sure that the kind of extended family relationship you envision is realistic.
If everyone is on board, then you and your boyfriend should talk about what relocating will mean in terms of not only selling this house, but also the impact it might have on your ability to earn a living. This property may be terrific, but if it cannot offer you the lifestyle you wish for, then you would be better served to move. But only you can decide that.