DEAR ABBY: I have been estranged from my family for many years. It was a decision I thought long and hard about, and I have no regrets. It was one of the wisest decisions I have ever made, and it helped me to maintain my mental and physical health.
I recently had a baby, and my family has been sending me gifts. In the past, I have returned them all, but I feel torn under these circumstances because the gifts are not for me, but for my child. Normally, I would write thank-you cards for such things, but in this case I don't want to mislead anyone or set a precedent that such things are welcome.
Please tell me how I should delicately handle this. There is no hope for reconciliation, and my child will not be having a relationship with any of these people. I don't want to hurt anyone; I just want to be left alone. -- ETIQUETTE-CHALLENGED
DEAR CHALLENGED: You have already cut your ties with these people. You do not plan to have a relationship with them, nor will your child. You are under no obligation to thank them for unwanted gifts, and your child will not be deprived if you send the gifts back. It appears this is an attempt by them to buy their way back into your life. The gifts should be returned unopened, with no comment.