DEAR ABBY: I have been in a relationship with "Bob" for 12 years. He doesn't work and doesn't take care of our children because he says it's "not his responsibility." I have supported him all this time, yet nothing is good enough.
He has cheated on me several times. During his third affair, he had two kids with the other woman. He doesn't understand why I don't trust him and why I insist on seeing his cellphone. The last time I was able to get ahold of it, he broke down the bathroom door trying to get it back.
He threatens to move out, and if he does, that will be "the last I hear from him." I would be relieved if he went. I have so much anger toward him. I love him, but at this point love doesn't have anything to do with it.
I have asked him several times to leave, but he just keeps saying he'll be leaving on his own terms. I can't continue like this anymore. He brings out the worst in me and I hate it. What do I do? -- HAD IT IN PHOENIX
DEAR HAD IT: That you have tolerated this behavior for 12 years boggles my mind. Because this philandering freeloader has resided with you for so long, you may have to go through formal eviction proceedings to get rid of him. You have given him a free ride, and you may need the services of a lawyer to pry him out of there. If you do, consider it money well spent.