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by Abigail Van Buren

Secret Love Must Remain Unspoken

DEAR ABBY: Twenty years ago I fell in love, but never told the man how I felt. We spent a lot of time together back then, but I was always afraid to confess my feelings because we were both married to other people. Time went by and we went our separate ways, but I have thought about him many times. A month ago I looked him up on Facebook, and we have reconnected.

Should I tell him how I feel about him? I'm afraid he may not feel the same way. My question is, should you always tell people how you feel, even if it may hurt someone else -- like his wife and my husband? -- IN A QUANDARY IN SAN ANTONIO

DEAR IN A QUANDARY: My answer is NO. If this man is attracted to you or might like a fling, it could spark an affair in which two innocent people would be devastated. And if the feelings AREN'T mutual, you will look like a home-wrecking fool, so keep it to yourself and back off.

Read more in: Love & Dating | Marriage & Divorce