DEAR ABBY: I have been in a steady, committed relationship with my boyfriend, "Carey," for four years. We have discussed our future and have agreed that we want to get married and start a family soon.
As a child, I always dreamed of a big, fancy wedding. Carey, on the other hand, says he doesn't want one. He feels it would be a waste of money. After a lot of discussion, we decided to compromise and have a courthouse wedding followed by a small, simple reception.
My biggest issue is he insists we don't need rings, and he refuses to get me one. Although I have explained that a ring would symbolize our love and life together, and it would mean a great deal to me personally, he won't budge. Now I'm beginning to doubt whether I want to marry him.
What should I do? Am I being superficial? -- CONFUSED ABOUT MARRIAGE
DEAR CONFUSED: I don't think that wanting a wedding ring is superficial. It's normal. Furthermore, if you have any doubts about marrying this young man, you should put the wedding on hold until the two of you have had premarital counseling. Arguments about how money should be spent have ruined marriages, and it appears the two of you are planets apart on this important issue.