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by Abigail Van Buren

Woman Suspects She May Be Burned by an Old Flame

DEAR ABBY: I met a man 15 years ago who has recently come back into my life. I hadn't seen him in years. He says he wants to be with me and marry me, and I very much would like to be his wife. I live in one state, he lives in another and his work is in yet another state. He does travel -- not much -- but some.

The problem is I think he's married to his job. He says he wants to be home with me once we are married. But then he says that once his work slows down, he won't earn as much.

I'm not sure how I can do this, with him working in one state and living in another. Sometimes I wonder if he's really in love with me or if he's stringing me along. How can I be with him if I never see him? If you have any advice for me, please let me know soon. -- HEARTS AWAITING

DEAR HEARTS AWAITING: If a "little voice" is telling you this man may be stringing you along, make no hasty decisions. It's important that you visit him at his home at least a few times, get to know his friends and family, if he has any, and see how you would fit in.

You also need to decide how you would spend your "alone" time while he's working. If you are an independent type, you'll be able to fill the time. But if you're not, then face the fact that as much as you care for him, you'd be miserable. So look carefully before you leap to the altar.

Read more in: Marriage & Divorce | Love & Dating