DEAR ABBY: I'm conflicted about my role in supporting my children through the death of my ex-wife. We divorced 25 years ago. There was no significant other in her life. I would like to support them emotionally, but I feel the burial, funeral, etc., are matters for their family and her relatives.
My question is, am I right? And how soon should I go and be with my children? We have been in close touch, and I believe they know that I care and I'm here for them. They live across the country, so the distance and cost of transportation are concerns. -- CONFLICTED IN TEXAS
DEAR CONFLICTED: I'm sure no one expects you to contribute financially to the funeral of someone from whom you have been divorced for a quarter of a century. However, you should ask your adult children if they would like you to attend for emotional support. Because they are all grown and presumably busy with their lives, if your presence isn't needed at the funeral, you could schedule a family reunion at a time when it's convenient for all of you.