DEAR ABBY: I recently ended a two-year relationship with my boyfriend. We are both 20. He was a great boyfriend -- always patient, kind, gentle and loving. However, I was often impatient, short-tempered and controlling. These issues were my personal problems. I always tried to work on them, but although it got better, I knew I wasn't treating him the way I should. I ended things with him because I felt guilty.
It has been a month now, and I'm having second thoughts about having ended it with an almost-perfect person. I miss him. Would it be unwise to reach out to him again? -- BROKEN UP BUT NOT OVER IT
DEAR NOT OVER IT: Not necessarily. But before you do, allow yourself a period of introspection during which you focus less on your missing him and concentrate on why you were abusive to him. A man with his qualities deserves to be treated with more respect than you showed him. The truism, "If you don't value what you've got, you will lose it," applies to relationships.