DEAR ABBY: My 24-year-old daughter, "Lisa," informed me a year ago that she was engaged. She's a college graduate living in another state and still looking for a job. Her fiance is a young Marine who plans to make it a career.
Lisa was visiting this weekend and gave us the wedding date, which is in three months. She already has her invitations and bridesmaids picked out, etc.
As she was leaving, she broke down and said she had "something to tell me." They were married six months ago. She still wants to continue with her "wedding" plans, and have me walk her down the aisle.
My wife and I are extremely hurt and angry for having been lied to all this time. My question is, should I go along with this charade? Any other wisdom to impart? -- LISA'S DISAPPOINTED DAD
DEAR DAD: At least your daughter told you in advance. I have heard from parents who didn't learn the truth until months or years after the "wedding." Feeling as you do, calmly convey your thoughts to your daughter as you have done so clearly in your letter.
As to any "other wisdom" I would offer: As a low-ranking member of the military, Lisa's husband isn't going to make a lot of money until he climbs the promotional ladder. Their money would be better invested in other ways than the wedding of her dreams. They can reaffirm their vows later, in a way that is open, honest and less expensive.