DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have a "friend" who is involved in a charitable organization that provides donated items to people in need via community giveaways.
Over the years we have given various items to this person to use in these giveaways. However, we have noticed that some of the items we have given her are now showing up in her home, and clothing we donated is being worn by her family members.
Abby, we donated because we believed our things were going to those in need. Are we wrong to be upset that they have been kept for her family's use? We are considering no longer giving our donations to her.
She is a wonderful person, and we're hesitant to confront her with our concerns, but we are left feeling our generosity was abused. How should we handle this? -- USED AND ABUSED IN SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA
DEAR USED: Unless this "wonderful person" has been paying the organization for your items, what she is doing could be considered theft or fraud and an abuse of your generosity. To prevent it from happening in the future, deliver the items directly to the organization and not to her.