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DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I are in a serious relationship. Not long ago we got on the topic of marriage and what we are looking for. He comes from a religious family and I do not. His mother says if we don't get married in a church with a religious ceremony, she won't consider me her daughter-in-law and we won't be a married couple.

I want a civil ceremony, something outside and casual. Thankfully, my boyfriend agrees with me. We're just not sure how to deal with his mom and her point of view. What should we do? -- LOOKING TO THE FUTURE IN NEW YORK

DEAR LOOKING TO THE FUTURE: What you should do depends upon to what degree you want to placate his mother. Having the casual ceremony you want in the setting of your choosing, and afterward having your union blessed in a clergyperson's study, might be a workable compromise.

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