DEAR ABBY: In the past you have asked readers to tell you their pet peeves. You know what really irks me? It's when a man I haven't seen for many years runs into me and has changed to the point of being unrecognizable -- lost most or all his hair, stomach sagging to his groin and totally out of shape -- and the first thing he says to me is, "Oh, you've gained weight!"
What can I say to these fools without slamming a mirror over their heads because apparently they don't own one? -- NOT THE ONLY CHUBBY ONE IN TEXAS
DEAR NOT THE ONLY: Try this: "Have you looked in the mirror lately?"