DEAR ABBY: I'm wondering what I should do when my biological father dies. He and my mother divorced before I was born. I've had little contact with him, but my older sister and brother lived with him growing up and are close to him.
My mother died 20 years ago, and afterward I tried to get to know him, but he didn't want to know me. He never paid child support. Both he and my mother remarried. I was fortunate to have a loving stepfather, and I was very close to him until his death.
When the time comes, I am considering not going to my birth father's funeral. I have not told my sister how I feel because she thinks he is the greatest. I think he is a dirt ball.
What do you advise, under these circumstances? -- CONFUSED IN SIOUX CITY
DEAR CONFUSED: Funerals are for the living. Go to his funeral and give your siblings the emotional support they will need. I understand why you feel the way you do, but in this situation, it would be an act of kindness to keep your true feelings to yourself.