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DEAR ABBY: I'm the mother of two adult daughters. Their father and I were divorced when they were 6 and 10. He was an attentive father, and I encouraged and nurtured their relationship with him and always told them how much he loved them.

Five years after our divorce, he remarried. His new wife didn't care for the girls and made no secret of it. Our youngest daughter gave birth to our only grandchild. When the child was 4, my daughters were told by their father that they were no longer welcome in his home. They then revealed to me that during the 30 years since the divorce, their dad had never had a good thing to say about me and told them many lies. He died nine months ago, without patching up the problems between them.

Now my daughters want to be close to his wife! Please help me understand. I have strong emotions about this, especially concerning the grandchild. -- MISERABLE IN MISSOURI

DEAR MISERABLE: It may not be rational, but it's possible that your daughters want a relationship with their father's wife because they perceive it as the one last link to their father, however weak a link that may be.

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