DEAR ABBY: My ex-wife, from whom I was divorced for many years, died recently. Our middle-aged daughter, who grew up in her mother's care, was unhappy that I chose not to attend the funeral. (Actually, I never considered going.)
Not only would plane fare have been a financial burden, my ex and I hadn't communicated with each other for more than 30 years. She remarried and I didn't.
Was I wrong for not being there? I don't understand our daughter's feelings in the matter. -- MEANT NO DISRESPECT, MESA, ARIZ.
DEAR MEANT NO DISRESPECT: Funerals aren't for the deceased as much as they are for the living. Because you didn't mention whether you had maintained contact with your daughter since your divorce from her mother, I can only guess that she felt she needed your emotional support during that sad time, and that would explain her reaction to your absence.