DEAR ABBY: My ex-husband and I divorced seven years ago. He has remarried, and I also recently married again. He is still bitter toward me. His emotional abuse was partly to blame for our split, although I was not entirely without fault. I made mistakes, too, which I regret.
Two of my children hold me responsible for the divorce and continually throw my mistakes back in my face. I walk on eggshells around them. I have apologized repeatedly and asked their forgiveness. I'm afraid of losing contact with my grandchildren every time one of my kids becomes upset about the past.
I have been to counseling, but was told I just have to be happy with me. Is there a way my children can finally forgive me for the past? I'm not a bad person, just a flawed one. -- HUMAN IN ONTARIO, CANADA
DEAR HUMAN: We're all flawed, including your children. If they are determined that blame for the divorce falls solely on you, while absolving your emotionally abusive husband, nothing you or I can do will change their minds.
You have paid your therapist good money for the sensible advice you received, so please heed it. The longer you continue to walk on eggshells and tolerate the treatment you are receiving, the longer it will continue. Concentrate on your own life, and far more happiness will result than what you're experiencing now.