DEAR ABBY: I am an average-looking, middle-aged woman. I have many friends and a career I love. What I do not have is a partner. It breaks my heart. I feel excluded from an important part of life -- romantic love.
I have had relationships with men. All of them were disasters. At the age I am now, there seems to be little or no hope of finding anyone.
Most of my friends are married or in committed relationships, and I feel like an outsider. I am involved in my church and my career, and to all outward appearances, I look happy and successful.
But, Abby, inside I am terrified that I'll be alone forever. Sometimes I wonder how I will survive this life. How do I cope with my sadness and my fear of being alone forever? I hope for some good advice. -- SINGLE IN DIXIE
DEAR SINGLE: There are worse things than being alone. Chief among them is being stuck in a relationship (formal or otherwise) with someone who isn't right for you. If you are spending most of your time with couples, perhaps you should arrange to spend more time with other singles. Expand your circle. Travel, if you can afford it. It will make you a less depressed, more interesting person to be around.
If you need help for your depression, talk to a therapist. But never tell yourself you will never meet someone. It's self-defeating. People of every age meet and fall in love every day, and they are being married at later ages, too.