DEAR ABBY: My 78-year-old mother opens her mouth for only three reasons -- to tell me what to do, complain about other people and to remind me that when my older sister died, it left a void in her life no one can fill, including me and my other sister.
Several months ago, I visited Mom and she wasn't feeling well. She has a heart condition and osteoporosis, which makes her unsteady on her feet. A few weeks later, I called to check on her but couldn't reach her by phone. Because I live 150 miles away, I asked my uncle to check on her. He went to her house several times and rang her bell, but got no answer at the door. I called other family members and friends, fearful that she had fallen -- or worse.
Finally, that night at 10 p.m. I called the local police department. When the officers knocked on the door, Mom finally answered and told them that where she was or what she was doing was no one else's business! She later told my uncle the same thing.
This is a cautionary tale to the elderly or infirm who tell us to leave them alone. We will do so. But do not complain when you don't hear from us, because you can't have it both ways. -- FED UP IN TEXAS
DEAR FED UP: OK, you have now vented. Your mother is a difficult woman and you have my sympathy. And now that the dear lady has made clear how she feels, follow your mother's wishes with a clear conscience.
P.S. If you know any of her neighbors, consider asking them to let you know if her newspapers start piling up.