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by Abigail Van Buren

In Laws' Bad Attitude Tests Limits of Woman's Tolerance

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend of two years, "Bobby," is still technically married to -- and living with -- his wife and child. He says he "has" to stay there because his son has learning difficulties and needs his support.

Bobby wants to wait until his son is older and more stable. His wife is a shrew who is just there as a roommate. She knows all about our affair, but she wants to stay married. She says she still loves Bobby even though he no longer loves her.

This triangle is stressful for me and Bobby. Don't you think his wife should wake up and smell the coffee? Bobby and I want to get on with our life together without all of this baggage constantly interfering with your plans. What should we do? -- HIS TRUE LOVE

DEAR TRUE LOVE: The person who should be smelling the coffee isn't Bobby's wife -- it's you. You have invested two years of your life in a man who is as married as one can get. Bobby isn't going anywhere, and the sooner you accept that fact the sooner you can find an eligible man to spend your life with. This may seem hard to accept, but if you don't believe me, just give your "true love" an ultimatum.