DEAR ABBY: We will visit my in-laws for the holidays next December with our new baby. We stay in a hotel when we visit because the in-laws are both chain smokers and I am a non-smoker who is sensitive to smoke. This has created some distance between my in-laws and me. When we have visited in the past I resigned myself to the fact that they will smoke through our dinners and conversations.
Now that we have a little one, I do not want my in-laws to smoke in front of the baby. They don't visit us; we visit them once a year. Can I ask that they not smoke in their home while my family is visiting? -- MICHELE IN WASHINGTON, D.C.
DEAR MICHELE: No. And even if your in-laws agreed, taking your baby into a house in which the carpets, walls and furniture are saturated with smoke would be counterproductive. When you visit, arrange your get-togethers at your hotel or in the home of other relatives who are non-smokers. Out of love for their grandchild, your in-laws should cooperate. If you need backup in making the request, discuss this with your baby's pediatrician and get the facts and statistics about how damaging first-, second- and third-hand smoke is on a little one's respiratory system.