DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have two children, a 3-year-old and a 1-year-old. He has been deployed since June. We talk frequently on the phone, and I have been managing well since his deployment.
My problem is, I'm afraid I have managed too well. I am terrified that when he gets back we will have grown apart. I am so used to doing things on my own now that I'm not sure I will be able to go back to our "normal" routine of his helping me with the kids.
Abby, what are your thoughts? We love each other very much and had a wonderful relationship before he deployed, but I don't know how well you can gauge a relationship over the phone and via e-mail. -- ARMY WIFE IN MISSISSIPPI
DEAR ARMY WIFE: The feelings you're having are not unusual for spouses whose partners are in the military. The repeated separations are painful and wrenching for all the family members involved. I have a deep respect for the spouses of military personnel who must adapt to long separations and the reunions that follow.
Of course there will be a period of adjustment when your husband returns. It will take understanding and compromise on the part of both of you. If you love each other, you will work it out -- with counseling if necessary. And should you hit a rough patch, please don't hesitate to reach out for it.