DEAR ABBY: I've always been big on birthdays. I love the cake, the candles, the singing and a nice dinner. My husband wasn't a huge fan, but did what he could to please me.
Last year, his father died on my birthday, so naturally, my birthday was the last thing on his mind. Now the one-year anniversary of my father-in-law's death is coming up, and we will be getting together with the family for a memorial service.
I wonder if my birthday will always be clouded by sadness. Is it possible to ever celebrate the day of my birth in a happy manner and without feeling guilty about it? -- BIRTHDAY-CONFLICTED IN AUSTIN, TEXAS
DEAR CONFLICTED: Yes, but start next year. Or, if you prefer, by agreeing to a weekend getaway on a date other than your birthday this year.