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by Abigail Van Buren

Man's Inner Beauty Is Masked by Scary Mole on His Back

DEAR ABBY: I have been dating a guy who is wonderful, caring -- everything a woman would want. There's just one problem. When he takes off his shirt, he has an extremely ugly mole. It looks suspicious and is irregularly shaped. I can't stand looking at it, but my eyes are drawn to it like to a car wreck. To top it off, it has hair growing out of it.

I know he probably pays no attention to it because it's on his back. But I see it staring back at me. How do you tell a loving and caring man that you're turned off by his scary mole? -- GROSSED OUT IN OKLAHOMA CITY

DEAR GROSSED OUT: Because man was not born equipped with a rearview mirror, it takes a caring friend to tell him -- or her -- what's going on behind his/her back. It's not necessary to say that you are "grossed out" at the sight of the mole. All you need to say is: "Honey, you have a large, irregularly shaped mole on your back that looks suspicious. It doesn't look right, and you need to have it checked out by a dermatologist as soon as possible because I'm worried about you."