DEAR ABBY: "Louise" and I have been married three years. We met in another state and I relocated to take a job. I proposed to Louise after the move, and she accepted knowing this would be where we live.
Every summer my life becomes hell. Louise gets angry about the smallest things and picks fights frequently. This is in advance of all the grandkids' birthdays that occur in August. As the summer winds down, angry turns to weepy and sullen. She mentions "moving back for good," "I hate it here," "Quit your job and take less money."
Abby, I have a great job, and have told Louise to fly home as often as she wants. This scenario repeats each summer and increases in intensity. I know I'm going to wake up one day and not have a wife, because it seems her only solution is to move back.
I didn't like anything about the state we came from and was glad to leave. I moved there for my first wife and lost out on 14 years of things I loved to do. I'm bitter about it to this day. I'm happier here. I have no answer to this problem that is acceptable to Louise. Please help. -- MY WIFE OR MY LIFE IN TEXAS
DEAR WIFE/LIFE: If ever I heard of a couple who needed mediation services, it's you and Louise. Whether the answer to your problems is divorce, or Louise living part of the year near her grandchildren, is something only the two of you can negotiate -- if it's even economically feasible. If you love each other enough, you can work out a compromise, and that's what I'm hoping you can do in a caring way and without anger.