DEAR ABBY: There is a situation at work that has smoke coming out of my ears. I'm past the age of retirement, but need to continue working. I'm with a great company and enjoy what I do.
The fly in the ointment is one of our salespeople. He's a big, strapping guy who comes barreling down the narrow aisles between cubicles. On more than one occasion I have had to execute a quick side step in order not to be run over. After the most recent near miss, I told him in no uncertain terms that if it ever happened again, I'd let him plow into me and take the consequences.
My question is, if I don't get out of his way and do get knocked down, what recourse do I have? Good manners would dictate that the younger man allow me to pass first, but are there any legal ramifications? I would love to smack him (like Bette Davis would in an old movie), but with my luck, I'd be charged with assault. What say you, Abby? -- ON A COLLISION COURSE IN WISCONSIN
DEAR ON A COLLISION COURSE: Good manners would, indeed, dictate that the younger man allow you to pass first, if the younger man has been taught basic manners by his parents. Apparently, this salesman's parents didn't do that. So rather than smacking the ignoramus, you should address your concerns to your supervisor, so he or she can tell him to slow down and watch where he's going. If you were injured on company property, the liability would be the company's, and the physical ramifications for you could be serious.
DEAR ABBY: A few weeks ago I had one of the greatest days of my life when I married my fiancee, "Joy." The ceremony was interrupted when my brother-in-law's cell phone rang. I was so annoyed I turned around and asked him if he'd like us to wait while he took the call.
The backlash at the reception later was all directed at me! Joy and my side of the family laughed about it. But Joy's family was angry and said I should have ignored it. What are your thoughts or advice? Should I apologize even if I'm not sorry? -- ON HOLD IN CHANDLER, ARIZ.
DEAR ON HOLD: Your brother-in-law owes both you and Joy the apology. He should have turned his cell phone off before the ceremony. If he's in a field where he's on call 24/7, then the phone should have been set to vibrate rather than ring.
P.S. Please tell me he didn't actually answer it. Readers, has this happened to you?
DEAR ABBY: We live in a retirement community that includes some single men. On a couple of occasions, one of the gentlemen has come into the clubhouse with his zipper down. If there are no other men in the area, what would be the appropriate way to handle something like this? I know it would be embarrassing if the problem was addressed in a public manner. What's your suggestion? -- BLUSHING IN ARIZONA
DEAR BLUSHING: Take the person aside and tell him quietly that his fly is open. (It's not unlike telling someone of either sex that he or she has a bit of salad stuck between his or her front teeth.) This way the problem can be remedied quickly and efficiently, with the least embarrassment to either party.
Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby -- Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)