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by Abigail Van Buren

Parents Should Answer Girl's Threat With Some Tough Love

DEAR ABBY: My husband's grandson just graduated from the eighth grade. Because he lives in another part of the state we were unable to attend the graduation, but we sent him a graduation card with $5 enclosed.

My husband's daughter called to acknowledge the card "for" her son. Then she asked if my husband was having financial difficulties because he sent only $5 while some of her friends gave her son $50. She said we should have sent more. My husband was so shocked by her insensitivity that he hung up on her.

His daughter did not call or send a card on Father's Day. However, today we received a card from his grandson thanking us for the $5 and saying if we had dug deeper and added $1, he could have bought a slice of pizza.

Abby, how do we respond to these two? -- HURT GRANDPARENTS, ANAHEIM, CALIF.

DEAR HURT GRANDPARENTS: Unbelievable. Your husband was kind to send the boy anything in addition to the card. His daughter's response shows where her priorities are. I'll give her son this: He did acknowledge the gift -- but he should have stopped at thank you and omitted the snide remark.

How should the two of you respond? By keeping the lines of communication open and your wallet closed.