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by Abigail Van Buren

'Tired' Husband Finds Energy to Leave His Wife, Daughter

DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Aaron," and I have been married five years. We hit a rough patch, and when I'd ask him what was wrong, he would always say he was "just tired."

One day I returned from work and found a note saying he had left me.

My husband has been gone more than a month now. We have a 3-year-old daughter. I have spoken to Aaron on the phone, and he tells me he's coming home, but he never shows. Our daughter is asking questions about her daddy that I don't know how to answer, so I just hug her and tell her he's not coming home right now.

I can't understand what has happened. Aaron says he still loves me. How can he put me through this? I could never leave my child for this amount of time. I hold out hope that he will come back, but deep down I know I should move on. I love him, though, and so does our daughter. How do I give up on that? -- BROKEN AND LOST IN KENTUCKY

DEAR BROKEN AND LOST: Unless your husband is in jail or witness protection, the chances are that he is with someone else. It would be better for you and your daughter if he would be honest and admit what's going on, but it appears he doesn't have the courage.

Because you're not ready to give up, you should stand pat. Sooner or later you'll learn the score, and when you do, you'll have a better idea of how to handle the situation.