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by Abigail Van Buren

Wife Threatens to Spill Secret in Midst of Couple's Divorce

DEAR ABBY: I am in a bit of a muddle. I have had a platonic friendship with "Greg" for four years. He is married, and I have a longtime boyfriend, "Randall."

About a year ago, Greg and I crossed the line into a romantic relationship. I guess you could call it an affair. Greg was unhappy with his marriage, and I was unsettled in my relationship. The affair ended six months ago, along with Greg and my friendship.

I felt so bad about the whole thing that I confessed and apologized to Randall, who (surprisingly) is still with me. He says he loves me. I realized that Randall is very dear to me, and I have no intention of ever repeating this kind of episode again.

As for Greg, I accept that our romantic relationship is over. But I feel sad that our friendship is over, too. He never told me I can't approach him or speak to him again. I don't know how to get our friendship back, if I even can. Can you provide any suggestions? -- MUDDLED IN VIRGINIA

DEAR MUDDLED: You are taking a lot for granted. First you are assuming that Greg wants to renew the friendship. You are also assuming that his wife would ever want you in the picture again, and last, you're assuming that Randall would not feel threatened.

Because you have asked for suggestions, I'm happy to offer one: Move on.